Carrie Bradshaw’s (Sarah Jessica Parker) romance list may appear long, but fans know that over the years, four romances have been significant ones: Mr. Big (Chris Noth), Aidan (John Corbett), Jack Berger (Ron Livingston) and Alexander Petrovsky (Mikhail Baryshnikov). Of course, Big was and always will be his great love, but Aidan has just returned for the fourth time, with no competition, with great chances of finally ‘taking a chance’. While Petrovsky was a desperate attempt to ‘have someone’, Berger was even considered as potentially ‘the right guy’ for her. He ended up being, even by the actress’s own vote, “the worst of Carrie’s boyfriends”. Hard to disagree, even with Drew Barrymore’s defense.

Interestingly, even in Dubai, Carrie bumps into Aidan, but she never mentions a note about Berger or Petrovsky, which is a bit bizarre. After all, Petrovsky was an internationally renowned artist and as long as he stayed in Paris, he would hardly miss New York. And Berger? Well, apparently it went from bad to worse because not a book, not a bump, or news about his fate.

Jack Berger was a writer like Carrie, smart, but it took her a while to realize how wrong he already seemed to be at first. Always talking about his ex, still hateful enough to curse her with “two fingers”, in addition to being rudely frank with her friends (the famous “he’s not into you” that almost earned a spin-off) and chronic self-doubt. To make matters worse, he ‘competed’ with his girlfriend, disposed of her, and simply ended it via post it with a “sorry, I can’t, don’t hate me”.

“Maybe Berger was right. If you’re going to break up with someone, just say, ‘I’m sorry, I can’t. Don’t hate me,” she pleaded to the team backstage. “Don’t drag them through weeks of indecision. As painful as it was, maybe Berger was an emoji,'” she joked.

But aside from the cheering for the romantic love they think Aidan’s return represents, it’s a little worrying that toxic relationships are still sold as ideals. Including Aidan and Carrie.

Mr. Big was the worst of all problems. The portrayal of a man emotionally unavailable, at least not to Carrie because he married someone else and then fell in love with an actress, was bought by fans as the man she would transform. , the worst illusion of a romantic ideal is that a man will change for the love of a single woman as if the ones he left on the way were nothing because of that one chosen one. How to forget that Big cheated on Natasha in her own bed? Or that he left Carrie at the altar? We forgive everything because she changed him, he got married, stayed faithful, and became the most understanding man on the face of the earth.

Who was on the other side of the equation was precisely Aidan. He came in as the opposite alternative of what Big was: honest, open, caring, and ready to stand by Carrie, but she cheats on him with Big. The two obviously break up, and he struggles to forget her, but, in a metaphorical post-it note, Carrie also dismisses him with an “I can’t, don’t hate me”. And he falls, forgives her, and takes her back only so the walls literally can’t be broken down. As he reminds us in the comeback episode of And Just Like That.

Honestly, I worry about Aidan. Carrie proved to him no less than three times that she would not be available to him. What has changed? Big’s death. Something she can’t get over, namely, for the FOURTH time, Aidan submits to being the alternative, not the central plan. It wasn’t him who changed Carrie, it was life. I know Aidan is a sweetheart and we want Carrie with a man who is cool, but apparently, she had this man: Mr. Big.

From the looks of the carriage, we’ll have a happy ending for Carrie, but I can’t say for Aidan. He deserved better for his low self-esteem than ‘winning’ Carrie as a replacement. If he’d had a choice, Berger would have had more than she gave Aidan. Even Petrovsky was more committed!

But again I would like to know what life has brought to Petrovsky and Berger. After all, we can no longer be with them, but neither do we hate them. If Big was forgiven, so could both of them. After all, Aidan forgave Carrie.

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