My God, what an episode! We’ve reached the halfway point of the third season of The Gilded Age, and if HBO Max doesn’t lock in at least one more season, they’ll be throwing away a massive hit.

It’s hard to even do a recap of tonight’s episode with so much happening at once!

At the Russell household, on the eve of the wedding, we learn that Gladys has spent weeks locked in her room, crying over her parents’ double betrayal. Yes, it’s easy for George to throw all the blame on Bertha when he made the bare minimum effort to stop his daughter from being quite literally exported into an unhappy marriage — one she clearly asked him to help prevent. Every detail mirrors the sadness Consuelo Vanderbilt was forced to endure.

Even knowing her daughter is wasting away, Bertha keeps pretending she knows best and that everything is going splendidly. The cruelty of this villain, who reminds me more and more of Cersei Lannister (who, frankly, showed more empathy toward her children than Bertha ever has), knows no bounds. We already know she’s set against Marian completely, and when Larry insists that the young woman be one of the bridesmaids, Bertha is clear: she doesn’t consider her worthy of her plans. But in the end, she gives in.

Larry is becoming increasingly bold — and different. After securing a place for Marian in the wedding party, he goes a step further. He invites his aunt, Monica O’Brien (brilliantly played by Merritt Wever), whom Bertha had hoped to keep far away. The snobbish Mrs. Russell is furious at the surprise but manages to handle it with grace. Monica is her complete opposite in every way and has zero interest in high society or wealth. Dressed inappropriately and completely unfiltered, she’s a walking nightmare for Bertha.

And yet, if it weren’t for Monica, no one would have found out that Hector, the Duke of Buckingham, lives with his sister, Lady Sarah — who is, essentially, the Bertha of England. That’s right, there’s one over there too. It was Lady Sarah (played by Hattie Morahan) who came up with the idea that Hector should find an heiress to fund their lifestyle in the UK. She has no plans to ever leave their castle, and only because of Monica’s persistent questions does everyone discover that Gladys’ future is even bleaker than expected — and expectations were already low!

Bertha manages to fix up her sister’s dress, but nothing can coax Gladys out of her room. George, always ambiguous, grows increasingly irritated by his wife’s obsession with grandeur. He claims he won’t force his daughter into marriage, even at the risk of public humiliation — but what he does instead is manipulate her.

Desperate over the communication breakdown with Gladys, Bertha dares to ask Marian to help convince the girl to appear at the church. Considering everything she says and thinks about Marian behind her back, the hypocrisy is infuriating. But Marian, who is not easily fooled (and oh, how I love my grounded girl!), does her part with dignity.

At the Van Rhijn house, Agnes and Ada are at the same eternal stalemate. Ada is managing Agnes’s expenses now, and another conflict arises: Agnes catches Ada talking to the medium Madame Dashkova (Andrea Martin), who claims she can help Ada speak to the late Luke. Agnes — who is, of course, never wrong — expels the medium and warns Ada, only to be completely ignored.

Back to Marian — it’s still wonderful to see her feeling at home with her aunts. Agnes, more relaxed than usual, even shares the wedding gossip from the papers and talks about Larry. She doesn’t know that Marian was only made a bridesmaid last minute, after someone dropped out, and Larry pressured his mother. Agnes believes it’s part of a strategy by Bertha to turn Marian into a suitable match for her son. Marian, ever realistic, tells her aunt that Bertha would never approve of her. Agnes, indignant (as she is never wrong), insists Bertha should be grateful to have a daughter-in-law like Marian.

The problem is that Larry is turning into something very different from what we thought, and more of a “Russell” every day. He and Jack close a massive business deal, leaving Jack with a fortune equal to Ada’s and nearly as much as Agnes once had (before Oscar lost it all). And that’s with Jack only getting 50% — I did find it greedy that Larry took half. In any case, since Jack feels that being with the Van Rhijns is like being with family, he hides his new wealth and plans to keep working for now.

In Peggy’s world, there’s a Bertha-like figure as well. Mrs. Kirkland is determined to expose everything she thinks is wrong with the Scotts — even if in a passive-aggressive way. She disapproves of her son’s choice, and our dear writer has already figured out that her parents are trying not to interfere, but it hasn’t been easy dealing with her potential future mother-in-law’s snobbery. Mrs. Kirkland disapproves of Peggy’s political opinions, her career as a journalist, and the relationship is headed for rough waters.

In Newport, Aurora is isolated and heartbroken, though she keeps in touch with Marian for moral support. Her inevitable divorce has made her a social outcast.

There’s an ongoing mystery that seems silly, but still: someone in the Russell house has been feeding intimate wedding details to the press, and Bertha wants to find out who. Adelheid suspects the dressmaker, and Church urges caution before making accusations. I’ll ignore that and go ahead and blame André, Bertha’s French maid, who’s already gossiped about Larry and Marian.

And since we’re downstairs — the romance between Borden and Bruce continues, but when he proposes, she reveals she’s already married. Her husband is in an asylum for “acute melancholia,” and since there was no infidelity, she can’t request a divorce. Borden is saddened but understands — he was stuck in a marriage not long ago.

And poor Aurora may soon have company in Newport. As I said long ago, scandals don’t spare the Astors. Charlotte’s husband challenged her lover to a duel, and now all the newspapers are hinting (in coded language) at the scandal. Charlotte confronts her mother, throwing in her face that the sham marriage she endures is not the model she wants for her life. Because of her indiscretion, Mrs. Astor faces several awkward moments at Gladys’s wedding — it’s all anyone wants to gossip about.

Speaking of embarrassing, Enid Turner is back! And apparently, she’ll soon be a wealthy widow. She won’t forget to make Bertha’s life miserable, and since I’m currently at odds with Bertha, I’m happy to see Turner back, always on the lookout for gossip.

Then comes the wedding day — and no one knows whether Gladys will appear. As if not showing up were even an option. Tension rises, and in the midst of it all, George receives a visit from J.P. Morgan, who informs him that the transcontinental railroad project is collapsing and decides to pull out. Still, nothing will change the plans of our train daddy.

Gladys finally comes downstairs — wearing the most beautiful gown of the entire series — but utterly devastated, as if headed to her own funeral. George apologizes and says he won’t force her to marry… but manipulates her into believing she should. He and Bertha deserve each other.

Just like Consuelo Vanderbilt, Gladys marries in tears — which Bertha conveniently ignores, weeping with joy over having a duchess for a daughter. That same night, she’s shipped off to England, and Hector, determined to avoid any risk of annulment, insists on consummating the marriage immediately.

And so ends the first half of the season — and judging by the trailer, what’s coming next will be even more thrilling. What a marvelous show!